Saturday, May 1, 2010

An ongoing issue I'm having with my marriage..


AAAHHHH, It drives me crazy!

Here's the story (there's always a story) behind this problem.

When my hubby & I started dating we both smoked (so gross) but we BOTH did it.

I found out he dipped by accident a few weeks into dating by picking up what I thought was juice in his car...blaaa, ewwww, uck! SO GROSS!

When we moved to Texas 2 yrs ago in June we BOTH said we'd quit!

I DID ( I will be smoke free 2 yrs in June, so HAPPY)


I though PB did too, FALSE!

He hides it from me, I have to hound him to get the truth. He only smokes when he's out with friends and since we live so far from friends it's rare but it still happens and he hides it. I can handle the smoking (shhh, don't tell him that) once every few months but this dipping habit that's come back 90% of the time is making me a mad woman.
A few weeks ago he was dipping every morning, let me remind you I only get this info after hounding him to get the truth. He doesn't tell me otherwise and he always lies about it at first.
I think he's gotten better about dipping in the mornings (probably WRONG though) but I know he dips when he golfs, which is weekly now.
SO GROSS! (this is NOT my husband)

It makes me hate him, it honestly makes me wake up the morning after finding out just resenting him. I can't keep doing this every few weeks when I get the guts to ask what I honestly don't even want the answer too. He tells me to stay on his ass but I don't think he realizes how much this affects me, my mood and my feelings towards him. It PISSES me off that he won't quit. WHY can't he quit, WHY doesn't he want to be healthier for his son and WHY can I quit and but he can't????

Do I keep asking and hounding or do I just let it go?
Do I accept that he does this?
Do I give up on trying to make him healthier?
What would you do?


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